Hermana Heywood

Kaitlynn in the Chile Puerto Montt Mission

Family Prayer for Natalie's Mission Decision, March 2, 2026

March 2, 2026 · Coyhaique / Herriman

The substantive call of this batch. Three threads: your first hermana-leader intercambio; your no-emotion goodbye with Carlos in Coyhaique; and the family prayer for Natalie's mission decision (the load-bearing event of the call).

Your first hermana-leader intercambio

Today was your first intercambio as a hermana leader. You did the unguarded move: told your hermana partners "I don't know what I'm doing, I'm just here, I'm trying, let me know if I do something wrong." Their response: when they heard who their hermana leader would be, they were excited.

My coaching, captured close to verbatim because you repeated each line back as I gave it:

"Even if you don't have confidence sometimes, because we're all kind of on a roller coaster about our securities and our insecurities - the one thing that we can always have confidence in is the Lord's judgment. And so if the Lord's judgment says you should be a missionary, and as your current role as an hermana leader, then you can have confidence in that. And everything else is going to fall into place."

You: "Who the Lord qualifies. Oh, that sounds familiar." You've heard "The Lord doesn't call those who are qualified, he qualifies those who are called" from many people on the mission.

Your own reflection on your growth: pre-mission, a piece of feedback about being inadequate would have destroyed you for days; now you can take a hit, sit with it, and move forward. "Of course I'm not perfect. But I can see that God is helping me, growing with me, and strengthening me."

Mom flagged a related pattern she noticed: "Maybe in the past you were unwilling to be consoled. If something was hard, you were just like, 'nope, I will be depressed for five days.'" You: "I think I was actually big on this. I didn't want to be happy. I didn't want to be people-d."

Carlos - no emotion at goodbye

You left your transfer in Coyhaique. Carlos (the one you ordered the BYU hoodie for) showed no visible emotion when you left. You felt almost like a stranger walking out: "Is this another missionary? Chao." You wrote him a note. Family debate: I thought maybe he had felt you were his favorite and then read your own behavior as uncaring; you felt you had simply skipped the flowery-words speech. Possible explanations included Carlos protecting his heart against the constant rotation, Carlos being a robot, or just Carlos being Carlos.

The family prayer for Natalie

The substantive thread. You proposed running the same exercise you use on the mission when an investigator is stuck on a baptismal decision: everyone on their knees, each person prays in turn, the prayers asking only that the person seeking direction can know clearly what they need to do.

Order:

  1. You: asked that the Spirit help Natalie know whether she should serve a mission or try a semester of college first; help her see through doubts; help the family support her.
  2. Me: asked for clarity; that Natalie know of God's love for her regardless of the decision; that confusion leave; that she have courage and confidence; that the family know how to best support her.
  3. Mom: thanked Heavenly Father for Natalie; asked that she feel peace and confidence; that she know of God's love.
  4. Natalie: was interrupted mid-prayer ("someone came in"); finished. Her prayer ended with the decision out loud: she would serve a mission and not go to college. She told the family afterwards: "From the second that Kaitlynn started, I knew. I was gonna go on a mission, not go to college."

When asked how she knew, Natalie's answer: it was immediate and certain. I then advised her to write a note to her future self about how she felt right now - because the adversary's pattern is to plant doubt in the weeks that follow the answer. You affirmed: the lead-up weeks to a mission are some of the hardest in a person's life.

Mom caught one more thing afterward: Natalie's prayer was interrupted ("someone came in"). She offered it as an unintentional object lesson - undistracted mission time will be better for Natalie than trying to do mission decisions through college interruptions.

The timeline

BYU-Idaho housing - long logistics session

You are coming home in September 2026. You'll do at least one semester at BYU-Idaho with Hermana Juncker. We worked through three housing options together:

No final decision in this call. You would call Hermana Larson to compare notes.

Closing - Carmen San Diego

Sign-off included you telling Natalie to keep a written record of how she felt during the prayer and that "the mission is the best thing you will ever do." You signed off with "Mr. Pickles" and "Carmen San Diego."

Cleanup Notes